May 8, 2011
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Taking a break…
Why I need to take a break from blogging –
**I have so many issues of my own to work on. Urgent ones. I cannot be spewing out any advice or “how to’s” or “shoulds” when I am feeling so undone myself. I am afraid that in lieu of what is real and what is hard I would write about what is not hard and that is not my life right now.
**I am too focused on keeping score. Who commented and who didn’t? Why didn’t this person write anything? How come this person got more comments than I did? I don’t like what I see in myself in this. Life is not a freakin’ competition. I see myself getting too much of my self worth from how what I write is received and interpreted and commented on. Issues, much?
**I want to spend the time I might have spent blogging on digging deeper into God’s word and spending time in prayer. I am not just saying that. That is what I want to/plan to do. I feel SUCH a need for God right now in my life, in so many areas, and I want to cultivate that need into a total and complete dependence.
**I have been feeling and fighting this prompting from God for a while now…to take a break from blogging. I am finally ready to say “I surrender.”
**I need to quit thinking in terms of “Oh, how could I write about this?” all of the time. Sometimes even in the very moment that I am trying to stop and enjoy, I am writing a blog post in my head. It is driving me nuts. I have long felt that sometimes it is like I am a spectator of my own life. I don’t want that.
**I feel like I owe you all an explanation. You are my friends. You are near and dear to me and if one of you was going away for a while, I would want to know why. I so appreciate you all and I am so very grateful for the friendships God has brought into my life through the world of blogging. Seriously!!
**If anybody had a certain book that they really had their eye on from the book list (I am thinking specifically of “beauty after rain” who mentioned that, but anyone else too) I would love to send it to you. Just message me and let me know what it is and I will get it out to you. I would like to bless you in that way.
**I am fairly certain I will be back. I just don’t know how and when. Writing is in my blood. It is therapeutic for me. I don’t see myself staying away forever, but God will need to let me know when I have His “permission” to blog again.
Comments (38)
well i hope you get the time you need
Blessings to you!! I think you will be blessed if you ernestly seek Him and His wisdom.
I will miss you. Hope to see you back before too very long, but I do understand the whole needing a break thing. Esp, got the comment competition feelings.
I’ll miss that sense of humor that keeps me grinning at my computer screen, but I understand the need for a break. See you when you get back
I will miss your posts…i have come to enjoy them. But i know that when something is necessary and its been something you know that you’ve been prompted to do…I’m all for it. Thinking of you…hope that yyou are able to spend that time that you desire delving deeper into the word, being real, learning from life, and just taking the time off that you need. I look forward to your return one day. you are loved Audrey.
We’ll miss you. But, i totally get the need to take a break. I did that with facebook for a while. Blessings to you.
You will definitely be missed, but I totally understand your reasons. I hope that God uses this time to teach you, strengthen you, refresh you, and that you are able to spend some good time with Him and your family. May God bless your obedience.
I totally identify with you Aug. That has been one of my biggest reasons for staying away from blogging of FB. I feel like too often I measure myself by comments of lack of them. I loved the freedom last year when I totally got off of on-line. It was so much fun to do things just for fun instead of with the idea that now I have something I could post or this would make a great picture to share. Or what ever. I want to do things for my family instead of doing so I can tell or share it with every one. And also I too feel like I have soooo much growing to do in every area of my life that that needs to be my focus. I just ordered the book “Real Moms, Real Jesus” , “My hearts at Home” and ” One thousand Gift” just because I really need to stay focused on what really is important. And need to stay in the mom mode and raise my children. That has been more and more impressed on me as they are getting older and time is running out and I want to do those things with them that I always thought I would do one day.
Blessings to you. Thanks so much for sharing and I pray that God would Bless you abundantly,
Love, Laura
totally acceptable. and, that part about being a spectator in your own life? yep. i’ve thought of that too. and, come to the conclusion that i want blogging to be about my life, and Not my life about blogging. and, you know? i think each one of us in the blogosphere can have our missions to accomplish in the blogging realm. it may not be an every-time-i-post mission, but it could be. it may not be an i-only-post-when-i-have-a-big-thing mission, but it could be that too.
you take the time you need girlfriend, and i admire you for it. and, that thing of spending more time in HIs word and prayer? didn’t think you were just saying that.
at. all.
i miss you already!
i will miss you. i admire you for making this commitment. i pray you will find healing, fresh perspective, and a clear sense of purpose in your time spent with your Father.
I, too, will miss your posts, but I also understand entirely. I pray God will meet you in the secret places of your heart with his wisdom and healing. I pray He will be your Centre. He is so Good!
I will be missing you too Audrey. You posts are encouraging to me, and I even mentioned you at our bible study lastnight. We’ve been reading 1000 Gifts and I said how you have been writing about your moments. You take all the time you need. All of your faithful readers will be waiting when you get back! =)
hurry back! enjoy the break……. luv u!
hurry back! enjoy the break……. luv u!
Oh I’ll miss you and your honesty and humility. Love the way your stories are real, and full of heart. Take your time, then hurry back!
hurry back you will be missed. I do understand though
girl. i love your honesty. and your courage to obey what God put on your heart.. been feeling some of those same tugs, so i totally get it. thinking maybe an “unplugged” summer might be in store for us!
i’ll miss you here.
And he said unto them, Come ye yourselves apart into a desert place, and rest a while: for there were many coming and going, and they had no leisure so much as to eat.
That’s the scripture I thought about when I read this post (I think it’s in Matthew 6…just looked it up and already forgot!). I get what you are saying, and think you are making a wise decision. God bless you with HIS richness and fullness and with spiritual blessings as you grow in His grace!
God Bless You Audrey as you read HIS word and answer to JESUS calling you to HIMSELF more completely. I admire your honesty here. I will miss your posts, but that is okay….God is very important in our lives.
Hurrry back! =) (But I understand!)
proud of you, girl! i don’t think that would be an easy decision, but I know you will be blessed for being obedient! I will miss you!!
Audrey, this just makes you more beautiful in my opinion. Wow, the strength it takes to make a choice like that, when writing is so “in your blood”! I’m sure you won’t regret that committment to more time with God and making peace with some of the things you talked about. He will! I’ll be honest that I haven’t been able to keep up with reading all your blogs, but when I do, then I’m just blessed and so often connect with your thoughts! You are a gifted woman and God can/will/is do(ing) great things with you! Tight hug…
Me too, Audrey. I will miss your updates and humor, the ability to make me think down paths I might not have other wise. I get the need of a break. Been on a half hearted one myself. I LOVE my online buddies, but when it puts me behind in the constant life around me, it can become very frustrating. The whole comment thing, I get it. Been there myself. I pri care less then ever, tho it tugs now and then. For sure if you think it’s personal. Like you see them involved everywhere but yours (FB n xanga). I know you will have a wonderful time with God and will return refreshed.
I bless you for hearing that call, and acting upon it. I know it is/was not easy…….
~~Enjoy the break. Come back soon.~~
I get this. I really, really do. And I really admire you for being able to make an entire break with it for a season. I’ve been stepping back some for some of the same reasons. It felt like it was turning into something that had too big a hold on my life. Like I needed it instead of enjoyed it. I’d come to the point where I felt obligated to comment on every post I read, where I needed to read every single post of my good friends (I wanted to also, but there were days when there wasn’t time and it turned into half obligation). When I realized that I was no longer doing so much processing and creating and just living on my own b/c I spent too much time checking everyone else’s blog, I realized it was really time to step back. I can’t think big thoughts when I’m doing busy work and even though writing helps me process life, blogging sometimes keeps me from thinking bigger things or really dumping it out and working through it. At first it was really hard. But the longer I stayed less tied …. forcing myself to sometimes not comment or not read or not post, the less I felt deprived by not having it. I wasn’t sure if I’d actually taken a significant step back except that I no longer was feeling such a huge pull toward the computer until last night David mentioned that I’d stepped back. It did me a lot of good to hear it b/c I hadn’t mentioned it to him at all. I want to blog because I enjoy it and to hold it open handedly, not frantically. And I don’t want to give it up entirely b/c my reasons for liking it in the first place are still there. Plus, it started feeling really hypocritical to me to say, I never have time to do “x” for myself when I was actually spending a lot of me time on the computer. So all that to say, “I really DO get it!” And I will miss you. And hope you come back. (I bet you’ll have some great posts brewing in the mean time.) And whether it’s a week or a month or a season, I hope you find the things you are looking for in your time away.
I really respect your decision, and I have been there myself, so I understand the need to take a step back for a while. But know that you will be missed, and welcomed back when you return! But I hope God meets you in beautiful ways on your rest! ♥
Lord bless you as you take this time that He has called you to. Keep pressing into Him!
I admire you for being sensitive to Him! You won’t regret it.
yup, i get it too!
i messaged you!
i am missing you here already.
but found myself nodding my head as i read
because i am tripping over some of the same things.
take all the time He needs…
I’m just now getting around to seeing this post…I totally understand and I’m glad you’re following God and what He wants you to do. you go girl!
I hope you find what it is God has set out for you. Healing … thats one of those things I always am curious about. How does healing come, when do you realize that you have recieved it, what do I need to sacrifice to get it. Its not that I don’t have answers to some of these, but I second guess them and also sometimes, ignore would be a good word to put there! I Hope you come away from this experience knowing who you are in a deeper way. You will be missed, and if there is ever something I can do for you … you are to let me know! I think you will! =) looking forward to hearing about your experience~
Proud of you for having the strength to do this and i pray you will find this time to be faith building in you. I’ll miss you.
I totally understand as I too am “there”!! I haven’t been blogging on my sites for awhile for some of the same reasons you mentioned. I do come online to read posts to get inspired or hear a message from Him thru others blogs.
I will miss your RWOTD and sense of humor but I know that God is going to bless this time for you. I will uphold you in prayer each day. Seeking God and His wisdom is a great reason to be taking a break.
Prayerfully
Debbi
You go GIRL! I’ll be here when you get back, and I pray that Jesus shows Himself very real to you. That you’re able to take the time you need to work thru the things that have been on your mind. I completely get it, and I’ve been thinking for a long time that I may need to take a break too someday….so enjoy your’s/
I totally understand this. I have went back and forth with this many times. How much am I writing for me, for others etc… What is the purpose of my blog? When I defined my purpose for it, it helped me draw boundaries. #1 and foremost I blog to capture memories of my family and my children. I note that this maybe boring to some but it is why I started my blog. I totally utilize it when I scrapbook. I go back and read many “moments” that would of been lost if I did not write them down. A second purpose for my blogging is to encourage others. I have my Digging Deeper/Devotional posts – where if there is something on my heart I will share it. It is not scheduled, I do not feel guilty if I do not post — I just share my heart a. when I have the time and b. when I need to just write it out. Then thirdly, I blog to share. I share ideas (Family Fun Friday) and share pictures and recipes once in awhile (Tasty Tuesdays) I love comments….. feedback is always great. But that is not what my blog is about…boundary defined. So always I enjoy it. I follow a simple rule. If you visit and comment on my site I will comment back on yours. It make take me a while but I will get to you.
I think we should all have times to unplug from blogging/net/facebook etc……..
I also got you in this post like everyone else… and gained so much more respect for you… because i already sorta idolize you
and then you are so vulnerable and honest that you are always showing me how human you are… and it encourages me… i’d write more but i just got a phone call that requires my full attention….